2003-03-31 - 10:26 p.m. - need
i always leave places to go home and go to sleep but when i get here i am too resltess to even close my eyes. i need to be wrapped up inside of someone, feel their ribs slipped up in mine, chins against necks, cheek to cheek, breathing each others' hair. i need to know that hearts still beat, that blood still flows through veins, that skin is still warm, and that tears can still be cried by nothing more than arms and faces being tangling and squeezing. i want to know that tears of joy still exist. i need to know that fingers can still trace faces from foreheads down to chins and that this gentle kissing of fingerprints to flesh can ease a stomach so nervous for weeks now.i am completely aware now that, right now, it is impossible to be alone. for me anyway, in this place, at this time. i have never felt so blanketed by heartbreak as i do everynight when i lay in bed not sleeping.
I think that this is becoming dangerous. I think i need to start taking sleeping pills or nyquil.
i need to close my eyes and feel you near me.
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