2001-10-22 - 1:06 a.m. - just some shit about teeth and tears
this is the part of the year where i always give myself ulcers and heart attacks over homework. i stress myself out way too easily. i can be such a slacker. sometimes i am the most ambitious slacker ever. i was thinking about that on my way to ceveland this weekend. how i always go to shows that require driving 2 hours. and how i drive two hours to see friends and play music with them. how amibtious that all is. and then how it is like pulling teeth when i have a reading assignment. how every wrod i read and highlight is like putting a pair of pliers into my mouth. wrapping the steel around my teeth and then yanking as hard as i can. and then i think about how when i was a little kid and one of myt eeth was ready to fall out, tot he point where i couldn't really eat or talk, and my dad would wrap dental floss around the bottom of the tooth. then pull the two ends of the floss in opposite directions ejecting the tooth from my mouth in a fine spray of blood. one time the tooth left with such force it bounced off of the mirror and out into the hallway. i picked it up, put it in an envelope and put it under my pillow. when i woke up in the morning the tooth was gone and there was a dollar bill in its place. now i realize i could get alot more money than that for selling my teeth on the black market. or not. and then you told me about the dream you had where all your teeth fell out and no one believed you even as you held them in your hand. and that was an odd dream to share because for some reason everything i have written for the last week has dealt with teeth.anyway, you did, and still do strike me as the 'tough as nails' type...and i will be surprised as fuck the day i see you cry for real (for real i say ('the greates day that i ever had was when i learned to cry on command) none of that shit!) i think i'll be amazed and maybe my heart will shatter into a million pieces. something about the strong falling? something about noticing pain in the places that hide it the best? but you know what? you are totally allowed to cry, and you are totally allowed to cry on my shoulder, because afterall, friends cry on friends shoulders, thats my final word on that. ive cried on friends shoulder. a girl i used to date and who i cared for greatly broke up with me online and my friend Alida stayed with me for a few hours and let me cry on her shoulder and it is still to this day one of the sweetest things anyone has ever done for me. i guess i just wanted to say, after reaidng what you had to say, that its okay...and even if you look like that dude from that new TV show when he was really sick, we totally will not be afraid of you.
and i just took nyquil so im out like a light.
xoxo
listen to: the palace brothers, Ten Dollar Typewriter (ed if you read this the new 7" is fucking AMAZING), oblongota, aloha, bonnie prince billy, party of helicopters.
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