2001-09-19 - 10:00 p.m. - --sugarwater--
this morning i woke up with x-ray vision. the ability to see through the outer layers of things and into their most guarded and shielded insides--secrets shaped in glass or woven from silk--which answer the questions that we are always too afraid to ask. and i know we all have days like this, really. when it rains and you open your mouth and tilt yr head back to catch raindrops in your mouth, to quench yr thirst and clean yr insides, but instead of water you realize that every raindrop is made of sugar, and yeah it might fuck up yr teeth with time but what its all really about is the sweetness of that particular moment and the sincerity of the weather to deliver something so perfect and beautiful into my body. and there is still the issue of sight. im not sure why or how but today everything made sense again. and really the only thing we can ever really believe in are the people we love and the people that contribute to the beauty around us.and its all like this poem i wrote the other day about how everything is getting totally out of hand and alot of the time we cant even hear ourselves think let alone the words spoken by the people we love beacuse we are always competing with louder and faster and safer cars and alarms and sirens and doorbells and telephones. and real sound has dissappeared. like when alarm clocks would ring and it would be a hammer vibrating between two bells. now we wake up to sounds digitally stored inside tiny boxes. and like i said even when we talk on computers we arent really talking or really, honestly communicating. we are slowly forgetting how to participate in true interaction with each other. and so anyway i wrote a poem about that and i really like it and i want to share it with you. but not here or now. i already shared it with some people and everyone seems to like it to some extent. and really i wrote it for everyone.
the wind is blowing hard outside my window. sounds kind of beautiful
and sometimes you are so fucking beautiful it hurts, and you don't even know it. how fucking amazing and surreal is that?
you tell me.
xoxo
listen to: the byrds, elvis costello, and other.
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